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Final Word — Obscure Sports Magazine

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Category: "Final Word"

It All Comes Out in the Wash

As they approach the bar, she evaluates the entrance situation for any obstacles. In one swift, calculated move, she pushes the door open with her elbow, enters and turns to prop it with her foot. Her friends pass through and make their way up the stairs. She trails slightly behind, paying careful attention to each […]

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Stages of Injury

Anger: WTF, Dude! Get out of the f*cking way! Don’t touch me! Denial: What was that? My bone is sticking out? It’s just a scratch. I’ll be fine. I just need to finish this game. Seriously, I don’t feel a thing!  Let’s get a drink. Anger, Part 2: Holy motherf*cking sh*t, that hurts. Bargaining: OK […]

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Torn

I saw you lying there. Beaten, worn, torn, tattered and taped. Tongue hanging out. Exhausted. 15 years of comfort. Gone. It’s time. Sorry, Amazon had a sale.

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Backyard Bondage

I might have been joking when I said we should make time to play more cornhole in the backyard.  My wish was simply to spend more calorie-burning time together, that’s all.  I knew I wouldn’t get anywhere suggesting kettlebells, ballroom dancing, geocaching, or urban hiking.  We had just returned from your family’s annual 4th of […]

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Familiar

As it winds down – another dodgeball Saturday well spent.  Hurling myself across the hardwood, making a battle out of something that wasn’t the least bit treacherous. Our host is packing up the equipment in a purple container, trying to make use of all available space.  His tired muscles flinch while placing ball after ball […]

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